Reasons Why I defriended you on Facebook

Thanks to my unusual powers at observing the usual behaviour, I have noticded that ,more n more people are developing some sort of "Social Networking Disorder" at a very alarming rate and something needs to be done before we start behaving like them, and that we will eventually...coz of the paradox that they r so many and we dont want to be left alone so we mindlessly do wht the rest are doing (the same reason why I gave in and embraced the whole idea of wearing sun glasses inside the mall).

But I will not be a silent sufferer while you drive me nutts through your moronic actions on Facebook. I have to (and will continue to..) DEFRIEND you. If you are reading this, here's why I defriended you on Facebook.

1. Your pictures:
You dont have to capture every moment of your life, you dont need to bore us with 555 albums, most of which will look like- "going for groccery shopping", "waiting for cab", "making dinner", "eating dinner", "blah blah...& shit shit". I dont have those kind of patience yet, especially when all your friends have sworn in to comment atleast 55 times on one pic. n just so I cant ignore it, you tag me in the pics tht am not even in....Its kind of mentally challenging when I have to watch all this while sitting in a brown cubicle and not being able to scream in pain and agony. So I Defriended you.

2. Your status messages:
I hate myself for knowing the kinds of you who feel the need to update the world on every happenings of ur life or describe every passing spectacle that crossed your eyes.. Just FYI, it doesnt make any one think that you are happening, it only confirms how sad you are- thts y I defriended you. what was the deal with updating the status with ur bra color ?? (I'd really want to know how many lives were saved with tht kind of Breast Cancer Awareness) n song lyrics.... really!! be original, be thaught provoking (if not revolutinary).

3. Your invitations:
Those game invitations...I dont care if you get killed by real mafia (higly literally) or if you grow shit in you farm and I hope your fishes get killed by a whale. also, i seriously dont wanna know who viewed my profile!!!!

4. Poke me not:
I view it as someone jumping up and down for attention - a behaviour most similar to my 4 year old cousins. instead I suggest you hit me with a hockey stick when you meet me in person.

5. Tag me not:
I am a normal person all thru the week but the weekends brings out the freak inside me (or the zombie) and just coz you happened to be there with your camera does not mean I must pose. just let me be. half of my frnds dont usually know tht am with the other half and these tags exposes my deception. plus there r work related ppl and in laws related future relatives on FB who must at all times remain oblivious to my "ghetto" lifestyle. (also those uncles who think am sucha bore and hence so adorable). You just could not stop tagging me and I just could not sleep in peace at night so I had to defriend you.

6.You were a newbie:
You were so new to Facebook that you did all of the above mentioned... all at once, instead of shooting myself with my dagger, I chose to defriend you.

7. You were from my hometown:
I love my ppl and my place so much I would take a bullet for Banswara. BUT not add them on Facebook. Just for sake of sanity. A month in a year is enough for all tht I can take... after all, theres a reason why I was raised outside the town. Apologies to the cousins, and their cousins, and their friends and all their parents, I had to defriend you, coz I dint really think before joining facebook that the Facebook revolution will reach my village too.

Even tho I have defriended you, I'd still be civil n nice when we meet in real life. But u must understand..that-Facebook is stupid, but am still on it!! It saves a lot on texting (am not cheap, am wise), it also provides me with the joys of looking at your wedding pics, and your babys pictures and those cute couple poses (mines pending for quite some time now) and how I can call up our mutual friends and laugh my gutts out at your current display pic!!! yes, I know am a horrible horrible person...y dont u go ahead n defriend me.